yacoba | Entries tagged with writer's block

I can't honestly the remember the last time I picked up a novel to read, I'm pretty sure it was back in high school when I realized that reading another author's work influenced my own writing style when I was trying to work on my original story. I didn't mind putting them aside, being unable to picture what I read or write I find graphic novels a lot more enjoyable to read anyway.

But I think I've finally shut the door on the part of my brain that let me write, I've stopped keeping track of how many months--more than a year now--have passed since I was last able to write like I used to. I started thinking about a novel that neekabe had lent to me many years ago and decided to buy it.

It's been a real joy to pick up a book and just read.

I had a bit of trouble trying to track the book down actually, as I couldn't remember the name of it, the author who wrote it [I was positive it had been written buy a man with a First, Middle Initial. Last Name set up] I remembered the main characters name but not the spelling.

Finally after much fruitless searching through fantasy lists, hoping something would spark my memory I did an Image Google search "Fantasy novel cover man with green wings" it was the fourth image on the page ^_^

So now I'm happily reading Transformation by Carol Berg in between cross-stitching.

Speaking of time for another Murphy update. If you saw her last time it was on August 29th and she looked like this:

Here she is today.

Current Mood: amused

Why has updating this thing become so hard? I think I can trace it back to when my writer's block shut the door on that part of my brain. *fist shake* I still haven't found a way past it, though I do still continue to poke at the final chapter of The Same Coin in the hopes that I'll be able to finish it.

Thankfully in the meantime I've been able to work on my cross-stitching, if my medications aren't making me 'better' they're at least not keeping me from my stitching projects. I'll hopefully be making an adjustment to them on Tuesday, no idea what that might mean--if anything--but there's always room for a little hope. Personally I'd like to do without the hope, is less disappointing when nothing good happens.

On a slight bright side I have pictures to share! I restarted Dodger [my sister's Cornish Rex] on March 26, here's the most recent picture from today along side the photo I used to create the pattern.

Am very much looking forward when I can finally close the door on this part of my life.

Current Mood: depressed, go figure...

I don't believe it!

Well I guess it was about time, since working on Romeo I really wasn't doing much else. I'm still struggling with a writer's block which is more like a massive re-enforced cement wall, coated in barbed wire with laser turrets ready to shoot anything insight and all of this is guarded by dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you. Not to mention the moat filled with hungry crocodiles and all of this is inside a huge hedge maze you'll never find your way through.

Needless to say I haven't written a single thing in more than a month. I'm starting to feel guilty again about The Same Coin probably because I received a nice review from a reader hoping for more story. I also never really thought I'd go this long without writing. *sad face*

I'm very out of it today, I haven't been sleeping well for the past weeks so I took 2 Trazodone last night which I used to do a lot [this medication is handy 'cause its not habit forming. I've up and stopped it on several occasions without any trouble but with the depression I'm really not sleeping period.] I found a few months back that 2 Trazodone leaves me exhausted the next day. Not sure what I'm going to do now since 1 isn't doing enough. I'll try 1 again tonight and hope it does the job.

Saturday I finally got to see Star Trek at my uncle's theater [its like being in the real thing] and I absolutely loved it just like I thought! I want to see it again there's some things I want to look for now that I know they're there [ie. the Tribble behind Scotty's shoulder] I'm definitely going to have to get it when I have a little extra money. And I'm looking forward to the next movie which has been announced, they left themselves a wonderful opening for sequels.

Current Mood: drained

So once again humanity has disappointed me. My sister recently got an iTouch, well it's been stolen. At first she just thought she might have left it at work, maybe somewhere in her room. But after it didn't turn up she remembered the last customer that came into the story yesterday. It was a woman with two teenage daughters. The one daughter wandered to the back of the story where my sister's iTouch was. Chris thought it was out of sight in a safe place. But apparently the girl wandered back there again...and it's gone.

Now you can't accuse someone based on that...but I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if that's when it disappeared. *sigh* my Oma has offered to buy her a new one as she can't afford to replace it.

The other day my dad found out that a friend of his was getting rid of a 52" TV. Who'd want to pass up on something like that. Now I don't live in the largest house and I thought it might be rather comical to show you the difference.

Haven't decided yet what I think of this new TV as the color seems off to me and I can't seem to adjust it to my satisfaction. It seems to favor red more than blue which is why I want to adjust colors separately...but I can't.

Edit: mum has stated that we won't be keeping this TV. Which I'm both pleased/disappointed to hear. I found with further adjusting of the color that I could get it looking basically normal in one scene but then when the show goes somewhere else [ie. Outside] the color looks all wonky again. *sigh* Romeo will be sad to see this TV go as he rather likes sleeping on the very warm satellite receiver. [will share picture later]

So here's a picture of Dax, I know he's identical to Dex but since I'm working on him differently I thought I might share a progress shot, 'cause it's kind of neat to see the shape of the wolf come together

Still absolutely no progress on writing I've never gone this long without writing something before. I'm dealing with it rather well all things considered, but I still miss that part of my brain. It feels like it's completely gone and I'm trying not to think about that too much.

Current Mood: blah
Current Music: Fringe

So I got told today *laughs*

I was in Grafton visiting with my aunt Noelle, I was talking in the dinning room with my cousin Chelsea when I noticed that my aunt's youngest James was trying to get my attention. He was standing on the computer chair watching me. So this is what happened.

Me: Did you want to show me something James?
James: No, I have to tell you something
Me: Oh? What's that?
James: I'm going to play reader rabbit, you have to move your bag *very matter-of-factly*

Edit: James is 4 years old

And there on the floor by the computer chair but at least half a foot away is my bag. Not in his way at all I might add, but it had to go...So I obligingly moved it, 'cause it didn't hurt me at all to do it ^_~ *laughs* little kids are hilarious

So as I mentioned a day or so back I've decided to change the way I stitch my patterns so I thought I'd take a picture of the way the old way looks so you might see what I mean and because...well I'm easily amused.

I'm hoping that the multiple seams won't make the pattern look odd from the front. You can't really avoid them even when I stitch the normal way 'cause moving across from one page to another creates them. But I guess I'll see when I'm done.

And the last picture is again because I can [easily amused remember?] is a pic of the two different shades of the same color. I've never noticed a different dye lot before but then I haven't been at this for a very long time.

So this is what happens when all I have to occupy my time is cross-stitching, I get boring. I'm still hoping that my writing will come back but so far no luck. I'm trying not to let it get me down but its hard. I really Really need to get back into my writing, I even find the act of typing relaxing.

*calling*
Here writing muse! Come out, come out where ever you are!

*sigh*

Current Mood: easily amused

*sigh*

This writer's block is really starting to make me doubt that I'll ever be able to write again. I was really hoping that today without the cross-stitching I'd be able to sit down and finally get some writing done...it's been well over a month for me. I haven't had any luck today not even with a prompt from Shuffles.

I've thought of a couple of things but they've never made it past the initial idea either it doesn't spark enough for me or I ask myself what's the point? I already know that there are readers who would enjoy anything but I just can't seem to get anywhere. And worse yet, I don't really feel much like writing...I really want this to change, I need it to change. I miss writing!

I really Really hope not, but I'm beginning to wonder if this block is a side effect of the meds, wouldn't be the first time this happened but I don't think it feels quite like the Celexa

As promised here is the picture of Dex completely finished!

Oh and as an added bonus for you

neekabe I have some pictures of Wendy's new story. It's so wonderfully huge! And the most amazing part is, this is all the stuff that they had in the old store. They were really crammed in there tight.

I though the Avid Reader was an amazing store back in its original home, but this is perfect! Love the little fireside lounge too that just makes it.

Look they have sunlight now! or they would if it wasn't raining out and you can see Jules waving ^_^

I think I'd really love to work there! I'm not really one for wanting to work so closely with the customers but I do love Wendy she's got a cheerful personality. She one of those people who you can't help but be cheerful when you're around her. I could use all the cheering I can get.

Current Mood: worried

I'm nearly finished Dex, I've got a little over half a page left. And tomorrow I'm heading to Peterboroug which means I'll be able to get some new supplies and possibly a pattern if one of them is in [I haven't heard from the owner of the store yet] I was thrilled to discover that there are 100% stainless steal needles I'm not sure if the store carries them but I can certainly get them online if not.

Still haven't written anything at all. I've been thinking about it a lot but I keep discarding every thought that's come to mind so far. I've even been struggling with the prompt idea that I thought was going to get me out of this slump. Granted I've been basically cross-stitching and nothing else.

I've been considering some common situations to toss Dean into and see how he reacts, I've considered looking through the prompts on one of the fic-memes in the hopes that I might be inspired by something. But unfortunately I think I've been over thinking all the ideas 'cause for one reason or another I tell myself it's a wasted idea. I'm really hoping that most of these problems might go away once I'm done this pattern. When I do start the next I'll set a slower pace for myself like I did with Todd which might help.

*sigh*

This has gotten old really Really fast!

Current Mood: tired

I'm lost...I think the only reason why I haven't gone out of my mind yet is because I still have the cross-stitching to keep myself busy. At the moment considering doing any of the usual things I like to do I find depressing. I really want to get back into writing but so far I'm striking out with every attempt.

No surprise this lack of creativity is only serving to depress me further. Shuffles gave me the prompt of 'snow' and I've been tossing it around the empty space I've been calling my mind for more than a week now. But I haven't really had any luck. I briefly considered trying for a story somehow involving Jack Frost [or a variation there of] But its just not catching me and neither is a simple one shot dealing with snow...'cause I can't seem to come up with something it should be about, and even when I have a plot I usually feel like I don't have enough of one.

*sigh*

Any suggestions for the prompt of snow [related to the show Supernatural] or entirely new prompts would be most awesomely welcomed.

As Shuffles pointed out earlier today, I really need to kick start my brain back into writing 'cause it doesn't want to do it on its own *fist shake*

Current Mood: pessimistic

I'm still feeling hugely blocked in the writing department, a few vague ideas bobbing around in my head but nothing concrete. It might just be that I can't really think of how to start anything or that I haven't taken enough time to do it. In either case at least the cross-stitching is keeping me busy.

Here's the progress as of today.

As I said yesterday I only have the water left to do and then it'll be done. My aunt is planning on framing it so I wouldn't have to bother completing the back like I was originally planning.

Oh look! it's two kitties, who are pro at looking comfy when they sleep.

Romeo was curled up under a blanket with my sister.

Went out for a walk today...and was a very bad kitty! I stopped in on my sister at work and she got me to by and shirt and hoodie, which I love! But probably shouldn't have bought right now *hangs head* But I love them &hearts!!

At

seregil's suggestion I went looking for decent pictures to take of autumn that I could share. I was also hoping to catch some of the filming that's started up again for Happy Town but either they're done again or just for the weekend so I'll check back next week.

Needless to say I didn't find much that wanted to take a picture of, so you'll get dead/dying salmon.